My husband is a Marine and I have always loved listening to his days in the corps stories especially since my oldest son is planning on becoming a Marine as well after college, he gets the “you need to be prepared for this” story. I marvel at all our soldiers go thru in the training process and can’t imagine going thru what they do from their Drill Instructors. I know there is a purpose but as a mom I am really apprehensive about my son going through what they must to become who they need to be to defend our country and make Marines out of boys, the same as my husband. The yelling and structure and my way and that’s the only way mentality of the DI’s and having someone treat my son that way, or should I say someone else. By someone else I mean me.
This week I was meditating on the verse:
She watches over the activities of her household ~ Proverbs 31:27 HCSB
I began contemplating what exactly this verse means and how this relates me and my family and raising Godly children and running a household. The more time I spent on it I realized I haven’t really been watching over my house as much as I rule over it. It bears a big resemblance to the boot camp in my husbands stories. There aren’t uniforms or 5am bugles but there is a drill instructor who doesn’t play. You may not have to drop and give me 20 but you will have to do laps on the stairs when you leave your shoes in the den. You won’t have to scrub the bathroom with a toothbrush at my house (I do that) but you may have a drawer dumped out that you need to reorganize when you have shirts that should be hung up stuffed into a drawer hidden among tshirts. I won’t even go into the many other little quirks and habits I have that when my household doesn’t want to stay with can lead very quickly to a most prized electronic device or two finding a new home locked away in my office. The my way or no way you cannot deviate from the plan and absolutely not leave anything out of it’s place mentality that has been my house or should I say Oliver Island.
This scripture really made me think about the way I run my house as opposed to watching over it. My house doesn’t need a micromanager and definitely not a drill instructor it needs a mom who is secure enough to be ok that everything is not done exactly as I would have done it, they have tried and that’s good enough. As the wife and mother I set, as do all women, the tone in my house and I don’t want it to be one of bootcamp but rather love and nurturing where everyone is free to step out of line. Still knowing that there is discipline and consequences for wrong or inapporopriate behavior but it’s ok for a short book to be on the tall book shelf sometime. That the role God has given to me as the one who watches over her house should be done the way He would do it, always in love and understanding not always as the drill instructor not allowing anyone to ever step out of line. Because after all, it’s not a matter of life or death if the transformers are left in the lego box.
I’m coming to a harsh realization that so many of what I’ve considered my control issues aren’t as much a control issue but a trust issue. A trusting in God issue. A false belief that somehow if I control everything around me it can always stay perfect and in the nice little clean box that nothing can touch that only exists in my mind and not in the reality of life where there is nothing that is perfect and by trying to control everything around me it only brings me unrest, stress, aggravation, lack of peace and even more than that a loss of God’s presence as I push Him out of my life by not allowing Him the control. In the process of micromanaging my life, surroundings and the lives of those around me (or should I say the illusion of control) I am robbing God. I am robbing Him of the opportunity to be the loving Father He so desires to be to me. I am robbing Him of the praise He so deserves. I am robbing Him of the rightful place He deserves in my life…FIRST! the driver’s seat, the control position. Well….I’M DONE!!!
Heavenly Father, from this moment on I will no longer rob you or deprive you of being in the driver’s seat of my life. I’m done trying to control every aspect of my life and turn it all over to You not holding on to any of it. I’m done not having faith in You. I’m done not trusting that Your Word is Truth. I’m done pulling Your Word out of context to fit my motives and to use it to control a situation but keep it the way You intended. I’m done stressing over things that are out of my control and turn them over to you. I’m done not being in peace and resting in You because something didn’t turn out the way I planned it. I’m done not worshipping You wholly for all You are and all You do even when it’s not what I thought I wanted. I’m done doing anything without You heading the path and diecting my steps. Father God, I’m done. I’m Yours!! In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Through a Bible Study I have been doing this week the reflection verse is:
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” ~ Colossians 3:23 NIV84
As I reflect on that I think how that verse applies to my life and how I can apply it even more. I typically have alot of “irons in the fire” sorta speak and get asked alot how do you do it all. My first response is that it’s grace and it is. But in addition to that I think God gives even more grace when our heart is towards Him. No matter what the task at hand whether a huge event that will touch 100’s or sweeping under my sofa that no one will probably notice but me I try to do it as if it is for the Lord because it is. And that is rewarded. God cares about all we do so why wouldn’t He want us to excel in all we do?
I can’t even count the amount of times I have heard someone say that’s not my job or that’s not my department or the biggest no one asked me to do it. I don’t get that! Can you imagine how much Kingdom business could be taken care of and how many lives touched if we did everything unto Him? If we all truly followed this verse what we were doing may not be what we considered His Business but it could be freeing up someone else to do something else God has called them to. It’s all one big circle and it may not be your job, it’s everybodies job.
The other question to ponder is if your boss where watching would you do things differently? God is with us all the time! This is another area I think so many times we get off track-we will go above and beyond when an employer is watching or we know we will be critiqued by a coworker when it shouldn’t matter. We have to be very careful that we don’t mix up the lines of man pleasing versus God pleasing. The next time you think “that’s not my job” it’s ok but do it anyway and do all you do with excellence remembering the Great Promoter is always looking over our shoulder.